are cupcakes dangerousIn yet another example of zero tolerance gun policies taken to an absurd extreme, a 9-year old boy’s birthday cupcakes were censored by the school principal. Why? The principal decided that the little green Army men (a la Toy Story) on the top were “inappropriate.” So she instructed school staff to capture the plastic soldiers before they had a chance to attack the unsuspecting 3rd graders.

Susan Wright, the school’s principal, even went so far as to call the parents and lecture them for being insensitive after the Newtown school shooting. Most parents were outraged by Wright’s decision. But she stuck to her guns (so to speak) and issued this statement:

“In the climate of recent events in schools we walk a delicate balance in teaching non-violence in our buildings and trying to ensure a safe, peaceful atmosphere. On one hand, there are those who advocate arming teachers, having armed security guards and creating a fortress of defense in our schools. On the other hand, there are those who feel that guns create fear in schools and we need to put solid security measures in place plus practice routines to be prepared in case an emergency should ever occur. Living in a democratic society entails respect for opposing opinions.”

Sounds reasonable. But what does that have to do with cupcakes? Little plastic Army men are hardly a threat. And even if they were, it wouldn’t be hard to organize a platoon of GI Joes from Toys R Us to protect the school’s innocent young students. Pencils—and crayons, for that matter—can do a whole lot more damage. Plus, they look more like weapons. Are we ready to outlaw them?